Alienable Rights by Lauryne Wright

Author:Lauryne Wright [Wright, Lauryne]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: FICTION / Fantasy / Contemporary
ISBN: 9781647182236
Publisher: BookLocker, Inc.
Published: 2020-02-01T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter 41

No snarky handmade sign about aliens greeted me at the California border, but traveling through the radio dead zone magnified the high-pitched careening torturing my ears.

I made it through Donner Pass and was able to wait until the Gold Run rest stop for a potty break. It was busy but folks were full of cheer a few days before Christmas. I saw my first selfie stick used by a couple posing on a pile of snow with the majestic mountain backdrop.

Which means they didn’t see the red orb that swooped in the distance behind them. I flinched like I’d done back in my front yard that first time, then acted as if nothing happened and got back in my car.

I did ponder it, though. Because I heard something about “another stupid sign.” That and how “humans really suck at driving.”

Traffic was terrible going through Sacramento, compounded by a glaring billboard message upon approach to city center:

“HUMANS FIRST!”

In neon red, it advertised all manner of related merchandise, including ball caps. I couldn’t see the website provided for patriotic purchases as I crawled by in the clogged far lane, but a radio-blasted commercial filled me in.

Whitehouse.gov. So much for the Emoluments Clause of the Constitution.

Jax Smith of SlayNews was also in on the deal, for which he claimed a God-given right to sell and yours to buy!

“With any purchase of a HUMANS FIRST! t-shirt and cap combo, I’ll throw in a FREE sample of Patriot Pill supplements guaranteed to block out evil attempts by globalist OW aliens to take over your mind!”

Not to be outdone, WhoAreYou.com offered half-price on ancestry test kits for the holidays. One wondered if they’d also cut your alien DNA percentage in half.

Next up, the feeble-minded founder of Everlasting Evangelical Ministry announced in his pinched, wheezy tone that an epic Christmas documentary will air that very evening.

“Proving once and for all time God is not an alien! He is an Earthly god come down from the heavens, a true-blue all-American deity. Not one of those demonic Red Orbiters that burn down houses of worship in cesspools of sin like Nevada! And, watch out for feminazi witches! They instigate fires against God-fearing decent Americans, and they will try to set your Christmas tree on fire. It happened to a family who went to church and left the lights shining on their blue spruce!”

Drivers were growing grinchy mean, maneuvering to find the fastest lane to sooner commune with loved ones for this sacred holiday. So get out of their way and screw you as they nearly caused a fiery crash on the sardine-packed freeway.

The National Rifle Association sticker was a nice touch next to one with a Christian fish symbol superimposed over a cross on the jacked-up pick-up swerving from lane to lane, tailgating, honking and flipping the bird. You’d think I was back in Yearntown.

My route afforded me a little traffic-god mercy because it continued on I-80 as opposed to the I-5 battle-route through Stockton. Still a crazy

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